I read this article last week that really struck me about how when faced with a challenge there are two kinds of people: those who throw up their hands and say, “I can’t cope!” or those who say “Bring it on!”. Of course we’re probably all somewhere in between but I was tested a few weeks back when I found out my son would be graduating from high school a whole year early.
Instead of feeling excited at the cool accomplishment my first reaction was to feel overwhelmed at the idea that he would lose a whole year and have to basically fastrack high school. I felt like we had to pivot quickly . Something I feel I’m pretty good at but this felt different because of how much emotion was embedded in it.
It turns out in the article published in the journal BMJ Mental Health, the research found that being better able to cope with difficult life circumstances was linked to a lower risk of death from all causes in older adults. The findings were derived by analyzing data from the Health and Retirement Study, a long-term survey of Americans ages 50 and over.
Resilience scores were determined through a self-assessment of qualities like perseverance, calmness, a sense of purpose, self-reliance, and the recognition that certain experiences must be faced alone. Those who scored higher on the scale had a lower risk of all-cause mortality by as much as 38% compared to those who scored the lowest. Try these tips to boost your coping skills.
One of the things I realized I first needed to do was to separate the facts from the emotion after spinning my wheels for a few days and perseverating on the problem and not getting anywhere. Here are the steps I took to feel better, more grounded and in the moment.
Whenever I’m feeling overwhelmed the 3 steps that help me gain some clarity are:
Take a deep breath (or 10 :)
Make a list (getting your ideas down on paper really helps)
Prioritize that list. What needs to be done first. Then next.
When is the last time you said Bring it On?